Category Archive

The following is a list of all entries from the Louise vs. category.

Louise vs. The Anonymous Critic

Just practising my angry face...

 Sorry I’ve been AWOL for so long  guys, my friend Emily and I have started a blog dedicated to NRL at In the Ruck. So ch- ch- ch- ch- check it out 🙂 (Yes that was a reference to Usher’s ‘OMG’. Well spotted). But because I am going to post an angry rant at my anonymous formspring attacker, I decided to revive this blog, rather than bring down the awesomeness of our collaborative effort. 

As you may have seen if you’re following me on Twitter or on Facebook, I have recently been under attack from an anonymous, NRL-hating coward. I have included some of the questions  they have asked me that I have taken as personal attacks and my fiery responses. I have left the posts exactly as they are to show you their disturbing lack of spelling/punctuation/grammar: 

Q: i am sorry but u srsly need 2 get a life over NRL, everyone is over u talking about it constantly 

A: Well since a large majority of my friends are also NRL fans I guess that not EVERYONE is over me talking about it constantly, so your argument is flawed.
What would you prefer me to talk about? Justin Bieber? HA!
Also, I’m sorry but you could do with a dictionary, everyone is probably over you making stupid spelling/grammatical errors. (Just a thought)

Q: at least my errors arent r thing dat every1 complains about saying omg dat louise chick is so gay, all she does is talk about football your friends r probs just talking about it because they dont want 2 hurt your feelings maybe ask them see what dey say? 

A: For fuck’s sake I cannot even read this question, it took me like five tries to even comprehend what you are attempting to say.
Would you like to give me some names/evidence of people not liking what I have to say? That way I can ask them “see what dey say”… If it’s true then there shouldn’t be any problem for them to tell me to my face that they would like me to tone down on the NRL talk, rather than appoint you as anonymous representative to attack me over formspring?
Also, if people didn’t ask me questions about NRL then I wouldn’t answer questions about NRL. So obviously some people are interested since they go out of my way to ask me these questions and read my blog. And I generally thought ‘gay’ meant homosexual, defined as “romantic or sexual attraction or behavior among members of the same sex”. So my love for hot football players isn’t exactly ‘gay’ is it?
Oh and by the way, you see that key between the ‘Y’ and ‘R’? That is called ‘T’ and maybe you should learn to use it… It’s really not that hard to type ‘that’ or ‘they’ instead of ‘dat’ and ‘dey’.

Q: can you shut up for like a second on nrl 

A: nope.
Can you stop being a prick and posting anonymous bitchy questions on my formspring for like a second?

Q: no i wont stop being a prick and posting anonymous bitchy questions! You annoy the shit out of me with your nrl clogging my newsfeed and twitter account. get a fkn life

A: Well then you don’t have to follow me on twitter if it’s clogging your precious feed up. Would you rather me post about Justin Bieber or something stupid like that?
If it’s so annoying why not have the courage to tell me to my face or at least tell me who you are so I know who to not talk about NRL with again. Maybe you should get a life instead of hating on mine? yeah?

As you can see, not only is my hater an anonymous jerk, they also lack the ability to spell and use correct grammar and punctuation. Maybe if they had been a little more intelligent about the way they went about their anonymous bitchiness then I would find their attack a little more concerning.

What I find most offensive is not their attack on me and their attempt to make me feel bad about myself. It is their dissing of the NRL. When someone bags out the NRL, I liken it to insulting my religion, and I will not stand for it. Sure, I’ll be the first to admit I do talk excessively about NRL… But is there anything wrong with a girl supporting a sport she loves? How is this any  worse than people who tweet excessively about Justin Bieber, Hamish & Andy, Gossip Girl, etc? In a society where obesity is a growing  epidemic, shouldn’t one be encouraged to have an interest in a sport that involves healthy, attractive males promoting physical activity? (Granted my ‘interest’ is better described as an ‘obsession’, but the idea is still the same). I hate to sound cliche, but does it all come down to the fact that I am a girl? Is this anonymous formspring dickhead just another one of those misogynistic dickheads who think girls have no business showing any interest in football? Or could it possibly be another girl giving me a not-so-subtle hint that maybe I should pull down the  NRL posters from my walls, and replace them with pictures of Twilight?

If that is the case (and I hope for their sake that it isn’t) this person has serious issues. It is interesting to note that they refuse to reveal their identity, perhaps because they know they are in the wrong? Perhaps, it is because they know that if I found out I would smack them down in a second? Or maybe, they are scared of the backlash they would receive over their absolute ignorance.

The NRL, in fact, hold a Women in League Program in order to recognise and reward the importance of women in the game. It is to raise awareness of the significant roles women hold in Rugby League and their important contributions to the code in Australia. As NRL CEO David Gallop said:

“The Harvey Norman Women in League Round is a celebration of the role women play in Rugby League and also a chance for us to say thank you to the many women who help build the foundations of our game”

 This coming round, starting the 25th of June, will be the fourth annual Women in League Round. As the NRL continues in their attempt to encourage women to take a greater standing within the rugby league community, maybe we should all put our differences aside and realise that there is nothing wrong with a girl interested in NRL. In fact as one facebook group was so kind to point out “There is nothing hotter than a girl who likes NRL”.

Anyone who thinks otherwise… the 1950s called; they want their attitude back.

To find out more about what your team is doing for the 2010 Women in League round, go here

Feel free to leave a comment, or if you’re a cowardly pussy you can feel free to go here and tell me what you think.


Louise vs. Parramatta

Woooooot! What time is it? Time to get a watch? Time to get a new joke? No. It is officially rant-o’clock. And it’s Louise vs. the World in a world first installment of Louise vs… And every “Louise vs…” will be accompanied by a picture of me not looking happy jan.  This week I get my bitch on against Parramatta.  

Someone obviously mentioned parramatta 😐


As I mentioned in my previous post I go to school in the middle of Parramatta, and just in case I didn’t make it clear: I HATE PARRAMATTA. With a passion. I hate everything about it; the Parramatta Eels, Parramatta Station, Parramatta buses, Parramatta Park… The word ‘Parramatta’ itself forges some deep kind of loathing that I didn’t even think was humanly possible.  

 The Parramatta Eels

Pretty much sums it up.


I do not like the Parramatta Eels. I cannot even begin to describe the immense dislike I hold for this team. In fact the only time I will cheer for Parramatta is when they are playing the Melbourne Storm, and that is only because they took out Brett Stewart in the 2007 Grand final. I think my hatred of the Parramatta Eels can be attributed to:  

  • The Hayne Train: No. Just no. If I read one more thing about the Hayne Train in the newspapers or while watching the footy everytime he so much as touches the football I will slap a bitch down. (Unless the word derailed is mentioned as well, in which case it is perfectly fine)

    This is the Hayne Train I'd like to see


  • Jarryd Hayne in general: I’m sorry to any Parramatta fans who may be reading this, but he is by far the most over exposed player in the history of over exposed players. The only time he even becomes remotely likeable is when he is playing State of Origin for NSW… and even then it pains me to cheer for him. I mean sure he is a pretty good player, but in my opinion he doesn’t live up to all the histeria surrounding him (and I would know because he is in my fantasy league team)
  • Parramatta fans: Ok, I lie, I don’t hate Parramatta because of the fans, but I do hate the fans because of Parramatta. Now don’t get me wrong, some of my best friends are Parramatta fans… Yet some people don’t know where the line between the love of one’s team and just being an annoying prick is drawn. I am sick of my facebook newsfeed being inundated with hundreds of groups dedicated to telling me that “Parramatta Eels are the Real Premiers of 2009”. No you are not. No no no no no.



Parramatta Station

Sure, Parramatta Station may not seem like a big deal, but it actually is quite scary for a young human of the female gender. Said scariness increases exponentially when you have to walk there by yourself because all your friends can’t be fucked to walk so catch a state transit bus and your bus pass only gets you on Hillsbus. (It’s a hard life).  

If anyone has been to Parramatta Station, you will know that the Underbelly series has nothing on what goes on down here. It is no joke, the crime capitol of AustraliaNew South WalesSydney… Ok so it probably isn’t the crime capitol of anything, but my advice if you ever go there is:  

  • If you are female, particularly when wearing a private school uniform, do not under any circumstances make the 15min trek from school to the station on your own. Always walk in bunches, preferrably taking up the entire footpath & knocking people out with your bags. If, as I mentioned above, this is not possible, walk behind some buff looking guys, or if you’re really lucky a police officer will walk out of Subway and you can casually stick behind him (read: CLING FOR DEAR LIFE IF NECESSARY)
  • If you happen to notice any criminal activity (and lets face it, it’s Parramatta, you will) just avert your gaze and do not draw any attention to it. In my 5 and a half years of walking to Parramatta Station and waiting for my bus there I have seen my  fair share of ‘unpleasantness’ and I will admit one particular incident did have me crying with a police officer, but I have survived nevertheless
  • Never, ever, ever give your money to the guy that sleeps at the bus stop.
  • Have the Parramatta Police Station on speed dial like I do. Although everyone knows that Parramatta is so dodgy you are guaranteed to see a dozen or so police officers on any given day. Today alone I saw one K9 car, one cage truck, two police on bicycles, and two just walking around the streets.

Do not associate with people who look like this ↓ They will take your money and maybe subject you to some hektik gabbering. Ew.


Parramatta Park

I generally spend a good two hours at Parramatta Park every Saturday morning doing my triathlon training, and while there is nothing wrong with Parramatta Park itself (besides the fact that it is in Parramatta), there are a few things about Parramatta Park that get on my nerves and I feel the need to rant about. 

Usually my rants are about the stupid people who push their prams in the cycle lane! Or who walk three or more abreast in the cycle lane. In other words, PEOPLE WALKING IN THE CYCLE LANE! There is a special place in hell reserved for people who do this, and it is one of my pet peeves. All too many a time I have been forced to come to a complete stop on my bike (which is quite a challenge when travelling at over 30km/h), get in the way of other, much faster, and usually male cyclists in my attempt to overtake these imbociles, or ride in the car lane which just freaks the shizz outta me. 

NEWSFLASH to people using Parramatta Park: There are three lanes. A Pedestrian lane. A Cycle lane. A Car lane. Please use the appropriate one. kthanks. 

Bike lanes are for bikes.

I also like to rant about the men who run in suits. I am not even joking, every Saturday morning without fail I ride past a little old man wearing a full suit (including shoes). And by suit, I don’t mean trisuit, I don’t even mean birthday suit.. I mean business suit 

Minus the briefcase


And this brings my ‘little‘ rant to an end. Of course there will be plenty more to come, and the fact that I live in Parramatta means you can expect to see a ‘Louise vs Parramatta continued’ in the not-to-distant future. 

But until then, feel free to vent your feelings about Parramatta, or any other city by leaving a comment. Hell you don’t even have to whinge about a place! You can whinge about anything you like, even me and my extremely prejudiced and politically incorrect blog 🙂